Thoughts of just another girl

just my thoughts

Archive for the tag “life”

” Who am I ? “

The bed shifts and I see the patient stirring, Thank the Lord, she’s finally coming to, everyone was sure that we had lost her..

I close the door to the ICCU and briskly walk towards the end of the corridor, nodding slightly at the other nurses who pass by me. I reach the consulting room where Doctor Martin had just finished talking to Tim and Martha Sully about the condition of their only child, Charlette, the little girl, aged 6, was suffering with a rare cancer..it’s another miracle that she was stable after such a long and dangerous operation..Lord has his own ways of working. I smile at them as they walk out of the room with tears in their eyes, hand in hand and they happily smile back at me. Those poor kids had a terrible time the last two weeks but now Praise the Lord for He has given their lovely daughter a new life and I wonder what He has planned for our Jane Doe in the ICCU.

“Doctor, our ICCU patient, Jane Doe, is awake.”

I see relief wash over his face. His one eyebrow had raised up as I had entered the room and as he heard the news, he began gathering his notes and his stethoscope and was muttering to himself. He’s worked in the hospital for 20 odd years and still thinks that nobody notices how he talks to himself about his patients. But all the nurses and the patients and the other doctors love him, because he is a wonderfully talented surgeon and a gifted human. I have been a nurse for the past 39 years and I don’t know of any other doctor who would have worked so hard, done everything in his power and more to save an unknown girl, who was almost brutally killed in a car accident or murder, as stated by Jenny, the young girl who had brought her in.

Doctor Jerome Martin was a simple man and a brilliant surgeon. He loved his work and he was incredulously happy that the two major operations he had performed the last week was a success and the patients out of danger. Now, Charlette was awake and was on the road to recovery but he worried about Jane Doe.

I wonder when Jane Doe will be awake, that is, if she ever wakes up.It was a risky operation, but it had to be performed, it was the only way to save her. We still have no Id of hers, even though Inspector Jacques had assured me that he was trying his best and no one has come forward with the missing report of a girl, in her late twenties and now with the….

His thoughts were interrupted when Nurse Jackie, probably the oldest nurse in St.Peters Hospital, entered the cabin. Her face was a mix of emotions and he couldn’t understand whether they were happy or worried cause they seemed to be a mix of both of them, then again reading emotions weren’t his strong suit and unknown to him, his left eyebrow shot up as he looked at her over his rimless glasses. The act of raising his eyebrow was so natural, that he barely even acknowledged it.

“Doctor, our ICCU patient, Jane Doe, is awake.”

As he heard her say those words, he couldn’t be any more happier. He took a sigh of relief. Thank God, she’s coming to, I hope that her brain’s functioning properly and she can answer all the questions and all her bodily functions are working well. Thank God, our worst fear of her being brain dead isn’t true, and hopefully we can find that inhumane killer of hers. I have to phone Inspector Jacques and check her stats, where is her file and my stethoscope, why is this desk always a mess.

He kept on muttering and gathering his papers and the stethoscope, unaware that Nurse Jackie was also in the same room and could hear him talking to himself, but then it was such an old habit that everyone, including his lovely wife, Lucy, had let it be and had accepted it as a part of him, a part which made him a better surgeon.

As he got up from the chair, he said, “Inform Inspector Jacques, while I go check on her. I’m sure he’ll be very interested in knowing that she’s awake ”

Nurse Jackie was nodding her head as she left the room and he walked towards the ICCU, to check on Jane Doe, hoping for the best. Hoping that the extensive brain surgery hadn’t hampered the working of her brain. There was always a 50 – 50 chance of survival, but he took the chance anyway , because there was no one to vouch for her, no one who had come forward to claim her, but then her face had also suffered some damage and we did have to repair her face tissues, but surely her face couldn’t change so much that she looked like a different person, I’m positive, she still looks somewhat like her old self, she does still have the same bone structure, and eyes, although the nose and the chin had to be worked on and she was barely out of that surgery when we found a clot in her brain. One whole month, that was how long she had been in the hospital, and she was barely ever conscious. She kept sinking again and again but somehow she managed to fight back and didn’t go in the light.

Finally today I can see a ray of hope, he walked inside ICCU and smiled at the girl on the bed, who was talking to Nurse Simone.

being myself-the clumsy one : walking!!

People are amused when I manage to fall over plain surfaces and normal stairs ,apart from the steep steps, on rocky grounds, on uphill roads, on creaky steps, etc so to know why I fall so often and why I don’t find anything wrong with it, I’m taking you back around twenty years to that time when I was a cute chubby toddler – or so the photos state- and so the journey of one of the most important element of life – walking starts!!  

(Yeah .. yeah.. u can smirk proudly but a fact is a fact and I am not going to deny  that I can’t walk properly .. I very well know that I fall more than I walk..)

Anyway as I was very fat  and heavy , my little feet couldn’t bear my weight and would occasionally fail .. so I was slightly reluctant with walking and when  I  hit my head at my cousin ‘s place after an unsuccessful attempt at walking, I had totally refused to walk anymore at all…

So my dearest mother had to take some extreme measures to make me walk …like making me crawl on the terrace in the afternoon sun in order to get rid of my crawling (after consulting with the doctor, who had suggested this ), owing to which I had started walking, running et al but unfortunately didn’t learn to walk straight !!

And the problem has since then stayed with me!!

Once I fell for like forty-five times (my friends kept count) on a ten minute road from the school to my friend’s place and  then another time I kept on falling in like every ten minutes at our trip to a hill station and dragged my companion along with me!

When I was seven or eight and was returning back from school head held high in the sky, one of my legs walked straight  into an open man- hole and I was left in an awkward position with one leg flat on the ground, the other hanging in the man- hole !!!

I fall while walking up the stairs and sometimes while walking down the stairs!!

I fall down so much that my friends have stopped reacting to it, its come to a point where they see me fall and say “oh come-on get up, we’ll be late” – they are so used to see me fall that they have accepted it to be a normal activity of  my life, they say I don’t fall, that’s just the way how I walk!!

And I walked so crooked that once during marching, i was told by my sports teacher that I had a funny walk and he was instantly reminded of penguins!! That nick name did stay around a while!!

I still walk  straight into people without realizing they were there!

I trip over almost every thing – from the tiniest pebble to the cable wire to the clothes!!

Almost every single scene on walking in the funny sitcoms have been experienced by me .. I consider myself a pro at falling!! 😛

Thankfully I haven’t had any major accident yet baring an hairline fracture from falling down the stairs and some other bruises and scrapes on my knees, arms, head, and legs.. but apart from that I feel proud in knowing that I can manage to walk easily  (walk includes the falling bit )without getting hurt!! It’s a stupid and silly thing to feel but whatever!! 

New Beginning..

A new day means a fresh chapter in your Book of Life…

At dusk when the sun just sets and leaves the sky in beautiful hues of blue, the entire surrounding and every minute aspect of nature acknowledges it, from the tiny insects to the birds who fly to their nests calling it a day; the chatter of the crickets start and night blossoms open up while morning flowers curl themselves up..and within no time the morning has turned into the night , the sun has gone and the moon takes its place and shines its light over the now darkened skies and twilight stars appear as if smiling at us and glad and happy that the sun has left and now they can show off their glitter…I enjoy this entire transition phase, nature seems to amuse me, surprise me and delight me in every small little detail..the on set of the night does not seem to hamper my hopes, it lifts my spirits up, not because I’m a fan of the night but because I know that tomorrow, yet again the transition would take place and the romantic night would surrender itself and give in to the bright morning..

At dawn the sun would rise and scare away the darkened hues of the sky and turn it into a feast of amber and orange colors , the stars would hide away and the moon would prepare to set itself , the night blossoms would go back into their sleep and so would the owls and bats and the morning fllowers would rustle up and impatiently wait for that first ray of light to open up and show their beauty  to the world..and a  new day had began already..

I think Mother Nature tries to explain us something that we tend to forget, that is a new day for new experiences and new mistakes to make, it doesn’t matter what we did yesterday, we can always make amends tomorrow, every day teaches us something new and that spending today in regretting what we did yesterday would only screw up whatever we have done..so instead accept the mistakes gracefully and start making amends now, to do what you want and to do it now or else you ‘d always be regretting that why didn’t you ever do it, when you could..

It was one such dusk and dawn that inspired to me to do  what I had lost somewhere in my routine life, to do that what I loved immensely, by taking out time from my day to day life, to write…

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